The Queen's Legend
by HarperGrey
Summary: Regina is in Neverland when she stumbles upon someone from her past. Cross over with The Legend of Tarzan.
1. Chapter 1

_**This is a little different...I watched The Legend of Tarzan and my mind wandered. And since it's the first streak of inspiration I've had in forever, I decided to go with it. If you haven't seen the movie, it starts with Tarzan 10 years after he becomes civilized. He's living with his wife Jane, in London, as John Clayton and does not want to associate with his past. He gets an invitation from "King Leopold" to visit in regards to trade relations and goes back to the jungle (for other reasons, but that's not important here).**_

 _ **In the movie, Jane is taken from him, forcing him to go back to his wild roots to save her. But in this story, Regina bumps into him in the jungles of Neverland, where Tarzan has returned and remained since the *death* of his wife...and I'll let you find out the rest, but they do have history ;) this will prob be only two or three chapters xxx**_

* * *

 _Neverland..._

"Only if you come with me, Regina." His deep voice and piercing stare shook her to her core. She knew there was a chance she'd run into him here, it was half the reason she'd been so snappy and nervous ( _aside from Pan having her son, of course_ ). Her heart began to beat wildly in her chest as she stepped in front of the group she was with, forcing her expression into firm lines that he matched as they locked gazes.

"Only if you let them go on their way," Regina motioned back towards Emma, David, Hook and Snow, "And leave them out of this."

She swore she saw an ounce of hurt flicker over John's rugged features before they hardened again, his fist clenched by his sides. He was offended that she feared him, that she would assume he'd hurt them, she could tell from his eyes. Deep down she knew he wouldn't, but years had passed and while she knew who he had been, she didn't know who he'd become in their years apart.

"Of course," John lifted his bulky shoulders, as his gaze flickered over the the group standing behind her, his expression becoming unreadable.

Regina swallowed hard at the memories creeping up in her and what she knew she was about to relive. She wasn't scared of him, _well,_ maybe a little bit after how they'd ended things, but she was more scared of the feelings she'd long suppressed that were now ripped wide open and flooding back to her. More for her pride than their safety, she turned to the group behind her in an attempt to get them away from her before a scene unraveled and exposed more of her history than she'd want them to know, "You all go ahead."

"Regina, we're not leaving you here, not with _him_ ," Snow frowned with concern, causing Regina to step forward and close the space between she and the group she traveled with.

"Go on without me," She whispered, eyeing each one of them seriously, "I will catch up with you. He won't hurt me, but he won't let you all go if I don't cooperate. And we can't waste anymore time," Her gaze landed on Emma, giving her a knowing glance. She was the only one who was like her, that understood when things needed to be done, "Go find Henry."

"We will," Emma pressed her lips into a firm line and nodded once before looking at her parents, "Let's go."

Snow and David exchanged a look, Hook meandering behind them with the same skeptical expression he always had. They eyed Tarzan as they moved in a group along the path, giving apologetic glances back towards her. After a few minutes they had traveled far enough that they disappeared into the foliage of the jungle, leaving Regina alone to face a man she hadn't seen in years.

"What are you doing here?" His adam's apple bobbed in his throat as he kept his stance, staring her down. He was shirtless, in nothing but a pair of pants that appeared perfectly tailored to him and worn in.

"What are you doing here?" Regina crossed her own arms, trying to appear unfazed by his presence when she was anything but, "Last time I heard, you were living in London with your precious wife."

"And last I heard of you, you were leveling villages and terrorizing an entire realm," His eyes never left her and she shifted uncomfortably, hating the way he seemed to always be able to look through her.

"That's none of your concern," She hissed, adding another brick to the wall she mentally constructed between them. There was no point in going into what had happened since they parted ways. He probably hated her enough as it was.

"I think it is," He took a step towards her, reminding her how big he actually was. Even with her heeled boots on he towered over her, causing her to begrudgingly tilt her chin up in order to see his face. Something swirled in her belly at how close he was, chiseled abs and bulky arms just inches from her touch. _She remembered his touch quite well._

"What do you want from me?" She glowered up at him, keeping her shoulders squared and her arms tucked into one another.

"Answers."

* * *

 _Enchanted Forest, years ago..._

John tugged at the suffocating collar he wore as he walked beside King Leopold, trying to appear interested in the conversation. He hated the clothing of this civilization and although he'd had years to become accustomed to it, he never seemed to. Though no one seemed to notice his discomfort. They were usually too busy gawking at his large frame or whispering about the shape of his hands. The women giggled behind their lace fans, making men either aspire to be like him or hate him instantly.

Regardless of his desire for a simple life and being left alone, it seemed he was never so. Since his dear friend Jane and her father discovered him in the jungle and brought him to their strange world he was constantly on display. They told stories of him, apparently he was what they called a legend across realms, though he never understood why. Ten years had passed since he'd left his home in the jungle and this place still felt foreign to him in many ways.

The man beside him had invited him for a stay at his palace in the Enchanted Forest and Professor Porter had insisted that he go, saying it was one of the highest honors to be invited to the kingdom. Jane had teased him, saying King Leopold had a daughter who was 'the fairest in all the lands' and that the King was looking for suitors for her. He certainly hoped that was not the nature of the visit, for he could never picture himself living in such a place. It was all stone, cold and drafty, no nature around except for the beautiful apple tree they approached as they walked through the courtyard.

"Ah, John, meet my daughter, Snow White," Leopold's voice brought him out of his daydream and they came to a stop beside a young girl dressed in all white. Her heart shaped face peered up at them, her smile hidden behind a flower as she curtsied in front of him. He placed a hand near his midsection, the other behind his back and bowed gracefully in front of the princess as he was taught to do. The customs of this world were not unlike the one's of nature. Gorillas had similar greetings, kneeling before those more powerful than you to show respect.

"Lovely to meet you," He managed a smile and saw the girl blush furiously and mumble something in return. His eyes didn't miss the maids peering out of the castle window not far from them, giggling behind their hands at the interaction between he and the princess. The Princess was pretty, but she was much too young for him to consider for himself and she seemed rather immature.

"And my wife, the Queen," Leopold added rather unceremoniously as he nodded towards the apple tree in the middle of the courtyard.

John turned on his heels, the breath catching in his throat at the dark haired woman who stood a few yards away from them. She was clad in a cream colored dress with intricate embroidery, the sleeves adorned with fur and a matching hat. Her gaze lifted from the apple she held and she gave him a breathtaking smile behind perfectly painted lips.

"Hello."

Her voice was soft and cinnamon-like, stirring something deep inside of him. There was a hint of sadness in her expression despite the brilliantly polite smile she gave him. She was older than the girl he'd just met, but not nearly old enough to be her mother. He assumed Snow White had to be from a previous marriage, for the Queen appeared to be only a third of the King's age.

He saw her smile turn slightly amused, making him realize he had forgotten his manners, "A pleasure to meet you, Queen," He fumbled to bow quickly and make up for the few seconds he'd been delayed by seeing her.

"Come now, I'll show you around the place," Leopold quickly pulled his attention from the Queen. John had worried for a moment that Leopold may have noticed how entranced he'd been with his wife, but one glance towards the man who had already turned to walk away told him that he wasn't as enthralled with her as he was. He glanced back towards the beautiful woman beside the tree who returned his stare briefly before turning back to the branches, prompting him to follow the King. _Reluctantly._

* * *

 _Present day..._

"Where are you taking me?" Regina snapped when she felt one of his strong arms encase her narrow waist, lifting her from the ground with ease. No one had dared handle her like that in years and it pissed her off, though she knew she was powerless against him and she wouldn't use magic on him. He didn't deserve that. "Damn it, John. Answer me."

"My home," He muttered as he reached up for a low hanging branch, lifting them from the jungle floor with one arm. His super-human strength had always amazed her, had even turned her on furiously in some moments. But being this close to him now only made her feel uneasy and she didn't know if it was because of the conversation she knew he'd make them have or the residual sexual tension stirred within her at the nearness of their bodies.

"Why?" She grit, cupping her hand over his shoulder reluctantly as he climbed higher, trying to ignore the ground becoming more and more distant.

"Because I want answers," He didn't look at her, just kept his arm wrapped around her waist, keeping her torso pressed against the side of his own as his other limbs navigated the large jungle tree.

Knots began to form in her stomach the higher they went and she found herself wrapping her arm around his neck before she knew what she was doing. He didn't miss it, glancing at her briefly with a hint of a smirk. The bastard knew she was afraid of heights and it had been years since she'd been this far from the ground. Deep down she knew he would never let her fall, but she'd never been able to conquer the fear.

"How far is this tree shack of yours?" She rolled her eyes, digging her nails into his skin a little as she clung to him, growing more nervous by the minute.

"Relax, Regina," He shook his head before looking back to the vines dangling from the branch.

"No, I mean it!" Realization struck her as he reached out for a vine and her heart caught in her throat when she felt him jump, "John!" She screamed when she felt their bodies fly in the air before his arm wrapped around the vine, catapulting them through leaves and branches, "I swear to god if you drop me I'm going to-"

"When have I ever dropped you?" He asked without looking at her, easily grabbing the next vine that took them further and further. He swung their bodies in different directions to keep momentum, causing her hair to blow across her face and blur her vision. She wasn't sure if it was a feeling she'd ever get used to. She preferred her feet flat on the ground, to be in total control of where she was going. But then again, there was something oddly freeing about it.

Regina clung to him, her legs having wrapped around his waist at some point and memories flashed in her mind. _Damp forest air. The wild, free feeling of adventure. The excitement of sharing herself with someone she actually wanted. Heated romps. Heavy breathing. Sweet words whispered in secret._

"Here we are," His voice rumbled, jarring her awake when his feet landed on the platform of his, for lack of a better word, _tree house._ Her heart pounded viciously in her chest and all she could do was stare up at him for a moment when he let her slide down his side onto her own wobbly legs. His arm still held her by the waist, allowing her to find her balance again as she tried to catch her breath. His own chest only heaved slightly, barely winded at all when he was the one exerting enough energy to transport them both.

He stared back at her with an expression that told her he was remembering things, too. It made her nervous, so she immediately withdrew herself from his embrace, reaching out to steady herself on the rope that fenced the platform. A glance down at the wooden planks made her dizzy with the knowledge that they were so high in the tree she could not see the forest floor.

"Regina?"

Her heart pounded in her ears and she closed her eyes for a moment to try to regain control, feeling a large hand encase her upper arm. "Come sit."

* * *

 _Enchanted Forest..._

Regina watched the stranger from her seat beside the King. No one paid any attention to her after all, so she could easily get away with it. His family name was John Clayton, _Lord Greystroke_ to the public, but in legend they called him Tarzan. She'd heard bits and pieces of his history from the giggling maids and buzz in the castle upon the news of his impending visit. Apparently his parents had died in the jungle, leaving him to be raised in the wild until he was discovered by the famous Professor Porter.

The grand feast and celebration happening was in honor of him, but he didn't see to be enjoying himself. He sat stiffly at the table in their grand hall, sipping at his wine and forcing smiles at lords and ladies who wished to meet the legend himself. She noticed him pull at his collar every now and then, causing her to smile faintly. Royal clothing was terribly uncomfortable, not to mention this lifestyle was suffocating enough.

Her gaze returned to the dance floor where half of the guests waltzed to the small orchestra that played the same tired songs they did at every gathering. The party ignored her as they usually did, no visitors coming to her table to speak with her. She wasn't the beloved Eva and never would be, so it was just as well. Besides, the way her husband over-indulged at these gatherings left her in no mood to carry on a conversation with anyone. She was usually too nervous for what her night would hold.

She found her eyes wandering back to the mysterious man again, feeling drawn to him for some strange reason. Perhaps it was because he looked like she felt...Like an outsider. Like he was just as miserable in this society as she was. Like he didn't belong. Her stomach flopped when his own gaze lifted towards her from across the room, having probably sensed she was staring at him. From what she heard he had heightened senses from living in the wild. Her silly maids had shared stories of how he could hear and smell like a wolf, had the reflexes of a cat, and could fight like a wild ape.

Regina quickly averted her own eyes back to the dance floor where her husband finished a waltz with his beloved daughter, pretending she hadn't been staring at John. She wasn't sure, but she sensed he was still looking her way and her cheeks blushed furiously at the knowledge she'd been caught. Luckily everyone's attention was drawn towards the front of the room where Leopold stepped up onto a platform to speak.

Dread filled her at the way her husband's own face was flushed from the alcohol, knowing he'd most likely find his way to her chamber tonight. At least for now he was occupied, pulling his daughter with him to the platform as the music ceased and the room hushed to hear what he had to say.

"Our family would like to thank you all for coming today," Leopold began, wrapping an arm around his daughter's shoulders. Snow beamed at the crowd and Regina had to stop herself from rolling her eyes at the way the people gazed lovingly at their King and Princess. "This feast is in celebration of our guest of honor, the great legend, Tarzan."

She glanced towards him again, not missing the way the man seemed to force a smile to hide the grimace at Leopold using his title. John nodded politely and raised his glass towards the King as the people clapped for him, being the ever gracious guest. Regina recognized the lack of sentiment in his expression, but no one else seemed to.

"We hope he has a grand stay here," the King continued with a proud smile as he hugged his daughter close, "I know my precious Snow White has been ever excited for his visit," the crowd chuckled at his joke, "and I do hope Lord Greystroke sees what I do in this great kingdom."

Bitter resentment crept up inside of Regina at the way Leopold looked at Snow as she gazed adoringly up at her father. No matter what the celebration, he always found a way to dote on her, "...I have great faith in the future of it and it's future leader. I know many of you miss my beloved Eva just as much as we do, but rest assured her legacy lives on," the King lifted his gaze to smile towards John and realization flooded Regina. _So that's why Leopold invited him, he wants to find a suitor for Snow._

 _"._..for my Snow White really is the fairest in all the lands," Leopold concluded and the small crowd cheered and clapped, leaving Snow to blabber and blush foolishly as she hugged her father's neck. Regina felt her stomach doing rolls as she sat alone at her table, watching the room fawn over the girl who cost her her own happiness. She pushed her chair back quickly when she felt the need to be sick, slipping from the table and walking swiftly for the back exit.

The cold night air helped ease the anxiety pitted in her stomach as she approached her apple tree, pressing a hand against the cold stone barrier around it and leaning forward. Shame and embarrassment and darkness ate at her insides, making her angry and panicked and sad all at once. What meaning did her life have anymore?

She was a prisoner in her own home. A play thing for a husband who ignored her other than when he wanted in her bed. A pretend mother for the obnoxious girl who ruined her life. A fill in for the dead woman who still held all of their hearts. Nobody actually looked at her. Nobody cared about her. No one recognized her sadness. Maybe her father did, but he was powerless to do anything about it.

As much as she hated her husband, she resented the love he had for his daughter. Snow White got the attention from the King and the love from the people without even working for it. Regina had actually been foolish enough to try to please Leopold at one point, but he'd shown her in blatant ways that he'd never love her the way he did Eva. Like occasions such as these when he'd publicly pronounce just as much.

"Are you all right, Your Majesty?"

A voice startled her and she straightened immediately to spin around, almost colliding with the man who she had been staring at just moments ago. She tilted her head back to look up at him, eyes wide and unsure. "Sorry, you...startled me."

"My apologies, I-" He backed up once and she instantly softened at the way he tried to make himself seem less threatening. It was almost as if he thought of himself as the beast they portrayed in the legends about him.

"No, it's my fault. I was off in my own little world," She smiled gently at him, seeing him holding his hands behind his back in a gentlemanly manner, "I'm fine, thank you. What brings you out here? Are you not enjoying your party?" She didn't know why she was prodding him for information, she could tell he wasn't enjoying himself. But something prompted her to ask. _Had he really come out just to check on her?_

"I noticed you leave in a hurry," His accent was proper but his voice was deep and comforting as he spoke, "I wanted to make sure you were all right."

"Why wouldn't I be?" She hated the bite of her reply, but she couldn't help it. He'd obviously noticed the way Leopold's blatant disrespect had affected her and it was embarrassing. _Wasn't it bad enough that she was an outsider in her own home? Others had to notice it, too?_

"I didn't mean to upset you," His expression was almost one of disappointment and it surprised her that he would actually care. No one had been bothered by her reaction to them for a long time. "I only wanted to make sure you were all right. I'll leave you alone."

"No-" She replied before she could think, seeing him stop from turning to walk away, "I'm sorry, I'm just..it's just..." Her shoulders sagged and she glanced towards the ground, feeling a strange urge to open up to him if only for a brief moment, "They'll never see me...they only see a pretty replacement for the Queen they actually love."

"Snow White's real mother?" She saw him give a solemn nod out of her peripheral vision.

"She's brought up at every gathering and I know it should not bother me but-" She shook her head and swallowed at the lump in her throat, "It's just a reminder that I will never be accepted here. That I don't belong here," She lifted her gaze and felt a solitary tear slip down her cheek.

He looked back at her with knowing eyes, "No one sees you for who you really are, only for the shadow of the person you live in."

"Yes," Her voice was barely a whisper as their gazes locked and she contemplated the fact that maybe he truly understood her. _Had she ever encountered anyone that did? Or that cared to?_

"I live in the shadow of my legend," He averted his gaze, his hands still tucked behind his back as his eyes traveled over the branches of the apple tree they stood under, "People approach me like they know me because they've heard stories."

"The stories are not true?" She quickly swiped at the tear on her cheek with the back of her hand before looking back at him. He carried quiet confidence and strength on the outside, but his eyes shown an inner turmoil that she felt she may understand.

"Some of them," He glanced back at her with a half smile, "Some of them are not...Either way, I understand what it is like to have people constantly around you, watching you, but never truly seeing you. They do not care to get to know you or I because they think they do already."

"They will never see me like they do Snow or her mother," She gave him a pained smile and a slight frown appeared on his chiseled features. He was handsome, disturbingly so. Squared jaw, cleft chin, light eyes that held so much depth and understanding. His hair was a little longer than most men wore, reaching his broad shoulders in honey blonde waves. _What would it be like to reach up and touch that face?_

"I would hope not," He answered, causing her to mirror the slight frown he wore, "They should see you for you."

"I'm not sure I even know who I am," She chuckled, though her voice carried no mirth as she averted her gaze to the ground again. "How can I expect them to see anything good in me when I can't find it myself?"

"I can see it," He murmured and her cheeks burned at the delicacy of the conversation. She slowly lifted her gaze back to his and found him watching her intently before he continued, "You are beautiful...not just on the inside, either."

She managed to scoff, clenching her jaw to keep tears at bay. She couldn't remember the last time someone had been so kind to her, "And how would you know?"

"Animals can always sense someone's spirit," He explained and her vision of him became slightly blurred at the tears that welled in her eyes, "They can sense fear and longing, can feel and desire love, can tell when someone is a gentle soul and when someone is not so," He glanced towards the castle before looking back at her.

"And you can do this, as well?" The way he was looking at her threatened to make her tremble. It was as if he could see through her, like he knew how much she longed to have someone, to be loved and protected. She suddenly felt vulnerable, remembering where she was and who she was. This wasn't appropriate, discussing such things with a stranger. A guest in her castle.

"We're all animals, aren't we? I just happen to be more in tune with my instincts than most."

She had to be careful. She had let herself forget her station and had let him know entirely too much about her situation. _Why had she done this?_ If he even hinted about it around Leopold she'd be in trouble. And who was to say he would not share the conversation he had with her with others? She'd learned trust was fleeting and the only way to protect herself from hurt was to not let anyone know what she was thinking or feeling.

"Well, I'd appreciate it in the future if you'd keep your animalistic urge to discuss such things to yourself," She bit at him, seeing the instant sting on his beautiful features, making her hate herself for being like this. If only she had the luxury of putting herself out there, of truly getting to know someone and not be hurt or rejected in return.

"Your Majesty, I-" He began.

"I should go back in before they notice I'm gone," She said before abruptly turning, making her way towards the castle and leaving John by himself.

* * *

 _Present Day..._

"How did you get here?" Regina sat on the edge of his hand crafted bed while he paced the length of his treehouse, hammering her with questions.

"I told you, we traveled through the portal," She knew what he was getting at but didn't want to give him any additional information. The briefer they kept this, the easier it would be. There was no sense in delving into the past when it wouldn't change anything. She had to find a way out of this and get back to saving her son.

"I know that, but why?!" He snapped, stopping in front of her, bulky frame tense with irritation, "This is _my_ home. Not yours."

"To be fair, I heard the Professor finally perfected his realm travel and that you were in London with Jane," Regina tilted her head up to smile fakely at him, "Is she here? I'm sure she'd love to see me. That is, if you haven't told her how well we _really_ knew each other."

"Jane is dead," He muttered and looked away from her, walking over to the balcony and leaning his hands on the hand carved wooden rail.

She felt like an ass. Worse than an ass. "..John I'm sorry I...is that why you came back here?"

"Yes," He muttered though she could no longer see his expression. His back was tense, she'd seen enough of his body to know where he carried his stress and it was all in his sculpted shoulders and arms. His hands gripped the wooden railing as he stared out into the jungle, the only noises being bird and various other creatures calling out into the fading daylight. She'd struck a nerve with him and it had instantly made her soften. She had no reason to keep hurting him, after all.

"What happened?"

"We got an invitation to visit another realm. During our travel we were accosted by a group of headhunters who were after me. They were able to separate us and they took her to bait me in, knowing I'd come after her. I got her back, but by the time I had she had grown ill to the poor conditions they kept her in. She died of fever."

"I'm so sorry John," She was almost afraid to speak, fearing it would spark the crackling tension in the air, "...Where were you headed? Who was after you?"

"The invitation was from you, to visit the Enchanted Forest once more..."

"But I wasn't-"

"You weren't even there, I know. I found that out from the man who kidnapped my wife," His voice was hoarse, thick and full of anger, "Perhaps you remember him? He was your husband's right hand, after all."

"Leon?" Regina frowned deeply, disgust filling her at the mention of him. He was always a sleazy bastard, which explained why he was Leopold's greatest confidant. "I had him imprisoned in the Enchanted Forest when I left...I thought he'd be dead."

"Well he wasn't. He used royal parchment to pen a letter to us on your behalf inviting us for a stay. The Professor passed along the realm travel device to us when he passed and we used it to take us there, it was only a trap waiting for us at your palace."

"But what did Leon want with you?"

"Money, power, I don't know what was promised to him," John turned to her with a pained expression, "He was working for an old enemy of mine who wanted my blood in return for killing his son while protecting my adoptive mother. So Leon brought us here and I...had to get used to this life again. I managed to defeat them with the help of my brother here, but it was too late for Jane, she was already too ill."

"How long ago was this?" Regina's heart shattered for him, recognizing the guilt and pain that he carried over his wife's death. She'd experienced the same after Daniel lost his life because of her, she still harbored some of it to this day.

"A few years, I don't know really, you tend to lose track of calendar time here," He gave a slow shrug of his shoulders and leaned back against the wall of the tree shack he'd undoubtedly built with his own two hands.

"I don't understand..." She watched him from her seat on his bed, studying his expression as he actively avoided her gaze, "You left to be with Jane...She must have made you happy. Why would you want to come back to the Enchanted Forest? After everything that happened-"

"The letter said it was urgent," His gaze found hers then and his eyes nearly bore holes in her, "...I thought you may be in trouble..."

The guilt hit her like a punch to the gut. Considering their history and how things had ended, she didn't deserve a second thought from him. But years later he'd traveled realms to make sure she was okay. He had lost his wife and his own happiness because he thought she needed him.

"You shouldn't have done that," She tried to sound firm but her voice wobbled, emotion making it sound raspy to her own ears. Her hands were the only thing she could look at and she suddenly felt so small. He had been living this solitary existence for years because of her, because he had never stopped caring for her.

"That is your response?" His large frame closed the space between them in two strides, grabbing her arm and pulling her into a standing position. "They were right, you really did turn into a monster."

"Let go of me," She hissed, knowing he only said it to provoke her and hating the way it still hurt her nonetheless, "You know nothing about me anymore," She jerked her arm from his grip and hit her hands against his chest in an attempt to push him away, but she couldn't budge his muscular frame.

"Apparently," He grit back, gripping her small wrists in his hands with fast reflexes.

"Why would you care what happened to me? You obviously heard I had turned evil," She snarled up at him, "Why would you try to help someone like me?"

"Because I knew who you really were and what made you that way," He yelled back at her, keeping her in front of him with his grip of her wrists despite the way she tried to pull away.

* * *

 _Enchanted Forest..._

John had been at the palace for a few weeks now, Leopold having found multiple reasons for him to prolong his stay. He found himself coming to greatly dislike the man who was doing everything in his power to make him feel welcome. His daughter was shamelessly flirting with him as well, having become infatuated with him in a girlish way. He couldn't take her seriously though, and while it was not her fault, he grew to resent she and her father.

It wasn't because they were rude or unwelcoming. They were the perfect hosts. His bed chamber was extravagant and the staff were constantly ensuring he had everything he wanted. There was entertainment every evening after dinner and balls every weekend. Snow fawned over him and Leopold treated him like he was already his son-in-law. They would sometimes discuss diplomacy between the Neverland and Enchanted Forest realms (the entire reason he'd agreed to Leopold's invite), but he had realized it was merely a lure to get him there and try to have him wed his daughter. The days were mostly filled with extravagance and excess, for Leopold didn't seem to have much interest in anything else.

The Queen was the reason he found himself not being able to stomach Leopold or Snow for very long at a time. She was also the reason he allowed Leopold to extend his visit, though he didn't want to admit it to himself. Regina was elusive and quiet, spending most of the time in her own chamber, even when the rest of them were enjoying group activities. The thing that made his blood boil was that he seemed to be the only one who noticed her absence.

When he did see her she was at the King's side, made up exquisitely and giving that beautiful fake smile. Leopold mainly ignored her, unless it was to criticize her for something. John watched evening after evening as Leopold would chide her in front of others and then leave her alone to dance with his daughter, or other maidens that seemed to want his attention. He wanted so badly to step in and defend Regina to the King, but he knew it was not his place and would probably only anger her.

Still, he couldn't ignore the heartache he saw in her eyes as she watched her husband dance with his daughter. There was a longing there and John knew it was not for romance with the King. The Queen simply wanted to be loved and noticed by someone in the way her step-daughter was. John had heard Regina still had a father, but he'd yet to see him around or meet him. She was entirely alone here.

It was driving him crazy, seeing how broken and unhappy she was and how everyone else was seemingly blind to it. He just wished she'd give him a cry for help; anything that would give him permission to intervene somehow. He didn't know why he was so drawn to her, he'd witnessed plenty of unhappy marriages since his return to civilization, but something in her eyes spoke to him.

He glanced around at the people remaining in the dining hall, finishing up their breakfasts. It was getting late in the morning and Regina still had not shown herself. Leopold, however, was sitting at the head of the table scarfing down plate upon plate in an attempt to cure his hangover. There had been music the night before and the King had imbibed quite heavily before stumbling down the hall for his wife's chamber.

Worry gnawed at his insides at Regina's absence, though he wasn't sure why. Growing up in the wild had told him to listen to those instincts, though, so he politely excused himself, making up an excuse about retiring to his chambers and not feeling well. He made his way out of the great hall and to the second floor, finding himself wandering down the hall towards the wing where the Queen's chamber was.

 _What was he going to say when he knocked on the door? Why was he even going there?_ The entire thing was inappropriate and he was sure there were probably men who would be beheaded for less. An acquaintance knocking on the door of the Queen's private quarters was simply vulgar.

Still he found himself lifting his hand to knock on the door of her bed chamber, giving a gentle tap on the solid wood. It was dimly lit on this end of the hall as he glanced around, checking that no one was approaching while he waited. There was no response for a few moments and he frowned, spotting the discarded wine goblet on the floor just a few feet from her door.

He swallowed hard and stepped closer to the thick wood, taking a deep breath through his nose in an attempt for his heightened sense of smell to give him a clue as to what happened here. _Blood._ The metallic scent invaded his nostrils, causing his stomach to drop. Something told him that there had been something terrible happen last night, prompting him to push the door open slowly.

"Regina?" He called out softly as he stepped inside. Jewelry scattered the floor in front of her dresser, her personal belongings having been cleared in an obvious fit of rage. His eyes grazed over the bed sheets, seeing them disheveled and half of them on the floor.

He heard a sniffle from the corner, his eyes following the sound to find her. Rage filled him at the sight of her small frame curled into a ball on the chaise. A nasty bruise had swollen her cheek and dried blood remained smeared on her face from a cut on her upper lip. She huddled, arms wrapped around her knees and tremors wracking her body.

"My god," He mumbled under his breath as he quickly made his way over to her, kneeling beside the chaise, "Regina, what has he done to you?" He reached out to touch her shoulder, causing her to jump. She was in such a state that she hadn't even been aware of his presence until now.

"No," She whimpered and her eyes shot open, red rimmed and wide, looking up at him. He watched as they searched his face and her body relaxed some from how rigidly tense she became when he touched her, "..You..." She murmured in realization.

"I won't hurt you," He reassured her, bringing a hand up and running it over her hair. Rage bubbled inside of him, making him want to charge out of the room and go choke the life out of the bastard King. But when he looked into the pained eyes of the shaking woman in front of him, he knew she needed someone more than she needed avenged.

"You're freezing," He whispered, feeling the cold damp air of the bed chamber seep through his own clothing. There was no fire in the fire place and he realized that the servants probably knew of what happened and had avoided Regina's room because of it, "Let's get you warmed up," He cooed and she only gazed back at him with an empty look in her eyes, body still trembling.

He stood and glanced around, spotting a heavy robe hanging on the wall. Making his way to it he removed it from the hook and brought it back to drape over her small frame, "Sit tight, I'm going to start the fire," He bit his bottom lip at how unresponsive she was, quickly turning to grab a couple pieces of wood and get a small flame going.

Once he was satisfied that the logs would soon catch fire, he straightened and saw the wash basin sitting atop another dresser. He made his way to it, picking up the pitcher and one of the folded cloths beside it before coming back to the chaise in the corner.

"May I?" He nodded towards the end where her feet were and she merely tucked them closer to her bottom, giving him room to sit down. "Can you sit up?" He asked gently, setting the basin down on the table in front of the chaise before reaching out to hold his hand out. She stared at his hand before looking up at him, reaching out slowly to take hold and pull herself into a sitting position.

"Do I look that bad?" She grimaced when she tried to smile and make light of the state of herself, pulling the robe around her a little tighter.

"Are you hurt anywhere else?" John watched her with concern as he dipped the cloth in water and wrung it out before motioning for permission to clean her face. She nodded once before averting her gaze when he brought the cool dampness to her skin, beginning to gently wipe off the dried blood.

"Yes," She mumbled though the way she refused to look at him told him all he needed to know. He didn't ask any more questions, sensing she wanted to hold onto the little pride she had left. So instead of finding out the details he simply cleaned her face with gentle care he knew she wouldn't get from anyone else there.

"He wasn't always this cruel," She whispered after a few minutes had passed, her eyes still void of any feeling as she stared back at him while he tended to her wounds, "He was rough and demanding, but never cruel. But he came to realize that I would never be his wife and he hates me for it."

"It gets worse when he's had a drink?" John nodded slowly, keeping his eyes glued on the task at hand. He sensed she needed to feel as if she had a bit of space and avoiding her gaze seemed to help her feel at ease to open up.

"Or if I refuse him in any way," She said quietly, voice barely audible, "He usually goes to his mistresses for his needs. I typically only have to share his bed when he gets in the mood for me...or when he's angry and missing his wife."

"If he misses her so much, why does he come to you?" He asked with a frown.

"To pretend I am her," Regina admitted and it took everything he had within him not to look her in the eye and apologize to her. But he knew she was proud and she would not accept his pity, so he continued wiping at her cuts gently and allowing her to speak, "Once his drunken fit of rage is over, he becomes emotional and begins to apologize to me and then he...and he calls me by her name."

Her voice was so thick with emotion and shame that he wanted to scream for her. He wanted to break things for her. He wanted to take that rage and destroy the man who hurt her. He didn't miss the tear that rolled down the cheek and over the swollen jaw he was tending to, destroying what was left of his heart.

"How did you end up here in this mess?"

"My mother arranged it. I saved Snow's life from a runaway horse and Leopold proposed to me and she accepted his proposal on my behalf."

"Your father, did he not try to stop it?"

"My father is weak against her...he could do nothing."

"And you had no one else to help you?" John felt an ache in his chest at the hollow, broken depths he found when he lifted his gaze.

"I had a fiance..." Her eyes ignited then with the first ounce of life he'd seen during this entire time at the mention of the man she obviously loved. He felt as if she stared into his soul when she really looked back at him, truly engaging with him now. It was clear to him that she'd never been able to share her love for this man with anyone before and he saw the eager, almost desperate way she approached the conversation, "Daniel. He was our stableboy...It was a secret, we only stole kisses and made plans for a future together, but I loved him so much."

John swallowed hard at the foreboding feeling he had in the pit of his stomach, for he knew this story did not end happily for her. He brought his hand down from her face, setting the bloody cloth in the wash basin before reaching for one of her hands, encasing them in his own bigger ones. "And what became of it?"

"My mother killed him so I would marry the King," She swallowed hard and her eyes lost focus on him, staring into the cold confines of her chamber, "She crushed his heart in front of me...He was so good, so pure," Her eyes found his again and there was a pleading look in them, as if she were begging him to understand her pain, "I cost him his life."

"Hey," John squeezed her hand gently, "You are not responsible for his death. Your mother is."

"No...no," She shook her head quickly, "Don't you see? I deserve the life I lead."

The words shook him to the core and he frowned deeply at the abused and neglected woman before him. He realized for the first time how crippled her sense of self worth must be to actually believe she deserved this treatment. She was innocent in all of this, but carried the full burden of it on her shoulders.

"Regina," He struggled to find the words to adequately express to her how wrong she was, "You deserve a lot, but it is not this."

* * *

 _Present..._

"Knew me...past tense," She glared up at him, "Now will you let me go?! I have more important things to deal with right now!"

"Oh yeah, like what?" The question was almost sarcastic from him and his grip tightened on her wrists.

"Like finding my son!" She yelled up at him, anger vibrating from her now. _Who did he think he was?_ Getting in the way of her finding Henry and demanding answers. She hadn't wanted to use magic on him initially, she was hoping she could talk him out of letting her go, but now she was losing her patience.

"You have a child?" His grip loosened on her immediately, the anger in his eyes turning into something much more sentimental. She remembered the conversations they'd had about family and the longing he'd carried to have his own, for she had shared that same dream.

"A son...he's eleven," She couldn't help but smile at the mention of Henry, averting her face from his view for a moment.

"And his father?" He questioned her and she met his eyes once more, seeing the concern laced within his expression. He still cared for her despite of how angry he was at her and she felt relieved for some reason.

"I adopted Henry...he's the biological grandson of Snow White and the Prince she married," Regina admitted, her jaw clenching.

"...and Henry, he's lost here?" John's brows furrowed in confusion and concern as he seemed to process the fact that she was a mother.

"He was kidnapped. Pan has him."

"Pan has your son? Why didn't you say something sooner?" He straightened immediately with a shake of his head.

"What like I had a chance to?" Regina guffawed and crossed her arms. "Now can I go?"

"Yes, but I'm coming with you."

* * *

 _Enchanted Forest..._

"Your hands," Regina murmured in fascination at the peculiar bone structure and impressive size of the hand he flexed over the edge of her balcony, pulling himself up onto it after climbing up the trellis to sneak into her room. They'd become fast friends over the past month, ever since he'd found her in her room after the night Leopold had been especially violent. It wasn't easy to spend time together without being noticed, though, hence him finding inventive ways to get to her chamber.

"I grew up walking on all fours, it changed the bone structure," He swung his bottom half over the stone railing and landed in front of her with catlike precision, smiling at her as he pressed his knuckles down against the balcony ledge and showed her the unusual shape of his hands.

"Interesting," She stared at it for a moment, pondering what it would feel like for that hand to touch her bare skin. Somewhere along the way she'd come to be dangerously attracted to him. She wasn't sure if his personality or his impressive stature that made her long for him more, but she found herself missing him when they could not be alone together. "So, where did you tell Snow you'd be today?"

"She's not my keeper, Regina," He gave a boyish grin that told her he was aware of her jealousy, causing her to roll her eyes at him, "But I made sure to tell my maid I would be studying in my chamber for the day and for no one to disturb me. So of course, she'll run along and tell Snow's maid."

"And she will tell Snow, so Snow will not look for you," Regina finished his sentence with a half smirk, biting down on her bottom lip when he stepped up to her, "John.."

"Regina..." He murmured down at her, reaching out to run his fingers over the edge of her jaw that had since healed from Leopold's blows. Her lip had scarred, however, and she was terribly insecure about her looks ever since. She'd been forced to come up with an excuse, telling everyone she'd slipped and hit her mouth off of the floor of her bath chamber. It was embarrassing, but still less shameful than the truth.

"What are we doing?" She gazed up at him curiously. They'd been toying at the line of friendliness and flirtation for weeks now and the tension was becoming unbearable. The danger of what they were doing was immense. If caught, it could mean both of their lives. Still, she couldn't help herself from being tempted to find out what it would be like in the arms of someone she actually wanted to be with.

"Enjoying each other's company," He smiled at her, brushing his fingers up to thread through her hair, rubbing her temple with his thumb, "I wish you wouldn't worry so much and just enjoy this."

"If someone would catch you, John," She began to try to talk some sense into him. Maybe if she made him see logic he would walk away from this and make it easier for her to do the same, "Leopold would kill us both. He wants you to be with Snow and if he finds out I've betrayed him...I can't let you throw away your life your future for us when we have none."

"Who says we have none?" He shrugged and stared down at her with those devastating eyes of his. They locked her in, pulled her closer, made her lose her train of thought.

"My husband, first of all. This kingdom. My step daughter..." She shook her head in an attempt to keep her wits about her, "There's no way we could ever be...together."

"But we're here, now," His gaze grew more intent, causing a heat to ignite in her belly at the way he looked down at her. There was a primal essence about him that was alluring, almost intoxicating. It had been nearly ten years since the sight of someone could make her feel that way.

"John..." She tried to sound firm but her voice had a heated ring to it that even she recognized. He stepped closer to her and she took a step back until she thudded against the stone wall behind her.

"You look so beautiful today," He smiled and cupped the side of her face again, causing her heartbeat to thrum in her chest wildly. She could tell he could hear it by the way the corners of his mouth tugged up into a smirk, "I know you feel this as much as I do."

"It doesn't matter, we're just friends," She breathed heavier, looking up into his eyes as he slowly leaned down closer to her. Even with her heels on he still towered over her and she found her hands reaching out to press against his chest, "Nothing can happen."

"Right, nothing," He shrugged as he pressed his own hands against the wall beside her, "That's why you flirt with me nearly every time you see me. Why I catch you staring at me during meals with that little glint in your eye that says you have an appetite for more than whats on your plate. Why you told me stories of your childhood and let me comfort you..."

"You are the one literally climbing walls to see me," She threw the accusation back at him, finding it hard to focus on his eyes when she felt him looking at her lips, at her neck, at her chest, like he was planning to devour her. "And extending your stay here...you're not innocent in all of this."

"Because I cannot bring myself to leave you or stop thinking about you," He pressed his forehead to her own as he pinned her between his body and the wall, "Let me kiss you."

"John..." She found herself repeating his name in this conversation. Perhaps it was because she couldn't bring herself to say no to him. If she did she knew he would retreat immediately, for he respected her and knew what she'd been through with a man who wouldn't take no for an answer. So, she simply did not say it to him, because she did not have the willpower to stop this.

"Just tell me no, Regina," He nuzzled his forehead against her own, the stubble on his strong jaw brushing against her skin deliciously, "Tell me you don't want me to," He whispered as he brushed his lips over the outside of her ear, causing her to shiver. She felt his breath on her neck and her nipples hardened painfully under the silky material of her dress.

"This is your last chance," His voice was hoarse now as his lips hovered over her neck and her hands trembled against his chest, "Tell me to stop," He whispered and her throat worked but she could not make herself reply. It was if her desire had completely stolen her willpower to refuse him. She wanted this just as much as he did, it was true.

She let out a moan when his lips found her neck and he devoured her skin, nipping and sucking and biting, letting out an animalistic groan before lifting his face to hers again. He captured her lips with his own, one of his hands carding through her hair as the other slipped between the stone wall and her lower back, pulling her body up against his.

"Mmm," She moaned into his mouth, feeling his tongue slip into hers when her lips parted. The hard strength of his body could be easily felt even through the layers they both wore and her stomach coiled at the thought of having nothing between them. Her heart beat faster at the way he touched and held her to him, tilting his head in the opposite direction so he could kiss her more deeply.

"I have wanted to kiss you for so long," He whispered against her lips before pressing his to them hungrily, making her melt against him. Her breasts pressed against his chest and they both groaned at the feeling of her hard nipples, making a throbbing sensation begin between her legs.

"Me too," She admitted and sighed into his mouth, her hands coming up to wrap around his neck and hold her down to him. She felt his own travel down her waist, finding her thighs and suddenly she was lifted from the ground, back against the cold stone as he pinned her to it by his body. He tore his mouth from hers long enough to look her in the eyes now that their faces were level with one another's and he gave her a smile that made her chest tighten.

"You fascinate me," He murmured and pressed his lips back to her neck, the sensation causing her head to fall back against the wall and her eyes close. She'd never been touched or kissed in such an intimate way and it made her stomach burn, feeling him standing between her legs that were now spread to make room for him. Despite the layers of her dress and the clothing he wore it was an amazing sensation to feel their hips so close together, "I know we are not there yet," He murmured against her skin as he pepped her neck with wet kisses, "But someday I want to bring you so much pleasure that you forget about your pain."

She let out a half gasp, half moan at his words and her stomach coiled tighter. Her hands found his hair as he switched to the other side of her neck, lips and tongue kissing and nibbling and licking it with the same ferocity. "Mmm," She whimpered and her hips jerked up against his own in a needy fashion. If she weren't dizzy with arousal she'd be embarrassed, but something in him brought out something primal in her.

"Your majesty." A muffled call from outside of her bed chamber door and a few knocks brought them both to attention. She stared back at him with wide eyes and heavy breaths at the sound of her maid. "I've just come to draw ye yer bath."

"You have to go," She whispered with a nod, finding her gaze on his lips, watching his mouth pull into a smile before he leaned in and kissed her once more as he let her down to stand on her own, "Go, now," She bit down on her bottom lips to suppress a giggle at the way he did not want to let go of her, "I mean it!" She pushed him towards the balcony.

He let his mouth drop in mock hurt before he grinned and grabbed the balcony edge, quickly swinging over his bottom half with ease before disappearing down the side of the castle. It was too close of a call and that could not, _would not_ , happen again. She swore to it as she smoothed out her dress and ran her hands over her hair on her way back into her room from the balcony, trying to collect herself. "Come in."


	2. Chapter 2

_thanks for all of the feedback! i didn't think anyone would be into this story/ship (I'm calling it JungeQueen, hahaha)! i just couldn't get the idea out of my head, so i'm soooo happy some of you are enjoying it. let me know what you think with this chapter :) xoxoxo_

 _ps. one of you asked why snow didn't recognize john, but she did! it was a subtle reference when she said "i'm not leaving you alone with that man" ;) more to come on that..._

* * *

 _Present day..._

"Ughhh!" Regina let out a groan that turned into a high pitch growl as she swatted at branches, leaves and bugs that seemed to constantly accost her on their path through the jungle floor. She'd refused to let Tarzan swing them through the treetops by vines, insisting that she make it to Henry in one piece. Her route didn't seem to be any better than facing her fear of heights though, for their were mosquitoes and foliage and slithery creatures that kept causing her to squawk when she encountered them. Not to mention it gave John a reason to say _I told you so_.

"You know if you would've let me take us through the trees we could've covered double the distance with half the effort by now," John replied to her fit of rage, taking her every moment of frustration to point out how she should've listened to him. She couldn't see his face from where he led her on the trail, insisting he go first in case of danger, but she was sure he was grinning.

"Just shut up and lead me to my son," She grumbled behind him, stomping along the path and hitting at the low hanging leaves with extra gusto, "Are you sure you know where we're going?"

"Regina, I was born in this jungle. I think I know how to get to Pan's lair."

"And you're sure that's where he'll be?" She couldn't help but question him.

"His camp is on the outskirts of the jungle near the water. It's the first place someone would look when they're trying to find him, is it not?" He paused for her to respond but she clamped her mouth into a firm, irritated line instead and he seemed to know her reaction without turning around, "His lair is secluded on an island. Harder for outsiders to get to. That's where he'll take a prisoner."

"And how will we get to an island?" Regina snapped as she tucked a piece of her damp hair behind her ear. It was hot and humid, causing her blazer to stick to her and her hair to lose shape and fall in her face.

"Ever heard of a boat, Queen _'Know It All'_ Regina?" He chuckled as he stopped and held a particularly large bunch of limbs up for her to pass through. She raised an eyebrow and gave him a heated glare as she walked past him, making sure he knew she did not find any humor in his joke.

"I didn't know apes knew how to work boat-aaahhhh!" She tripped over a tree root in the path, stumbling forward before catching her balance, "Goddamit!" She screamed with a sudden burst of anger, gripping the edges of her blazer in a fit and jerking it down her arms, wadding it and throwing it into the leaves, "This fucking place..." She muttered as she jerked the buttons of her burgundy silk shirt open, peeling it off and leaving herself in her black camisole and pants, "Like a goddamn sauna!" She growled, chest heaving with heavy breaths, "What?" She snapped when she looked up to see his bemused expression as he stood and watched her temper tantrum.

"Nothing, Your Majesty," He grinned and it only made her angrier, feeling like a fool for losing her temper and amusing him in the process. She spun around, storming off in the direction they had been headed before he heard him chuckle and grab her upper arm.

"What in the hell do you think you're doing?!" She berated him when he turned her back around and crouched, pulling her one arm over his shoulder and using his other hand to grip her thigh, easily picking her up onto his back. "I'm perfectly capable of walking by myself!" She protested as he wrapped her legs around his waist, not wanting him to know what a relief it was to her that he was giving her a piggyback ride.

Her feet and legs were aching fiercely from walking on this kind of foreign terrain and she was exhausted, but she'd never admit it to him. She locked her arms around his neck and huffed loudly to keep up appearances though he didn't respond. There was no use in arguing with him. He was just as stubborn as she was, just quieter about it, and ten times stronger.

John carried them in silence for a few minutes, the lull of his steps helping her relax from her stiff position and lean her front against his back more. He was much more agile than she was in navigating the forest and they were indeed covering more ground without her tripping and cursing. It was unnerving to be so close to him again though, to feel his body working underneath her own like she had many times before. By the time he spoke again, she had calmed considerably, and she knew he had probably remained quiet for that purpose alone.

"So, tell me about your son."

The inquiry about Henry warmed her, for it wasn't very often people simply asked her about the one family member she had. He was a subject she couldn't find it within her to clam up about. Her son was the one thing she'd done right in her life and she'd shout her love for him from the highest mountain if given the chance.

"I realized after I cast the curse that brought the people of the Enchanted Forest to Storybrooke that there was still something missing...I had nurtured my anger and revenge for so long that when I no longer had it I realized how lonely a life without family could be..." She admitted, biting down on her bottom lip. It wasn't often she would be so blunt about her feelings to someone, but this was John and she knew it was safe with him. _Or at least it used to be._ "Turns out all I needed was that little boy's love."

"And you adopted? Were you not interested in finding a partner and have a baby yourself?" She heard his attempt to remain casual but she knew him too well, could hear the sliver of concern in his voice at the idea of her finding someone.

"No, I didn't want a partner," She hesitated, considering of telling him the whole truth. He knew more about her than most people, after all. Still, she couldn't find it within herself to admit to him that she'd made herself barren, "I only wanted a child. What about you? Did you and Jane have any?"

"No, we were never so lucky."

Her heart ached for him, hearing the regret in his voice. They'd had many conversations about family back in the Enchanted Forest and she knew it was something that he'd always yearned for. "I'm sorry...I know you always wanted a child."

"I know you did, too," He said and her heart warmed at the reminder of who she once was before hatred and anger consumed her. It was nice to be reminded of the old Regina, for not a lot of people knew her, "I'm glad you were able to experience it."

"Thank you," She murmured and heard his hum of a reply, the knowledge that she'd let her arm dangle over his shoulder and her hand rest on his chest startling her with the vibration of his voice. "So. How long do you think it'll be until we reach the island?" She asked as she quickly brought her hand to grip her other arm that was still wrapped around his neck. _The less skin to skin contact, the better._

"A day or so, depends on how fast we move," He slowed his steps then near one of the trees with lower branches. She knew what he was suggesting and her heart began to pound in her chest when one of his hands reached up to grip the thick tree branch, "Do you want to get there faster, Regina?"

* * *

 _Enchanted Forest..._

John let out a roar of laughter when he heard her scream with delight, her arms folded tightly around his neck and petite legs wrapped around his torso as he swung from branch to branch. He'd waited so long for this woman to laugh and squeal and express joy like she was doing now as he showed her how he could navigate the tall trees of the forest. There weren't as many vines in these trees as their were ones of the jungle, but there were enough to showcase his talent and let her feel what it was like to fly.

He skidded to a stop on one of the older trees, feet hitting the limb and arms letting go of the vine to grip the limb above it for balance. The branch they stood on was nearly two foot wide, plenty of room for him to walk down it to the trunk where they could find a seat. She giggled and clung to him tighter, a hint of nervous energy in her stance at the fact he was walking on such a narrow path this high off of the ground.

"Easy," He chuckled, turning his back to the trunk of the tree and letting her down on it slowly, keeping a hold of her as he turned to face her and help her sit down, for her legs still wobbled from the adrenaline.

"I told you it'd be fun," John couldn't help but grin once he helped her sit straddling the branch, back leaned against the trunk. He crouched down and kicked his feet off of each side, straddling the tree as well as he came to sit and face her. Her chest and face were tinged pink, chest heaving with heavy breaths and her eyes glistening with excitement.

"Are you okay?"

"Mhm," She hummed and her eyes flickered down to his lips before back up at him, "To be able to do that must be so freeing."

"It has it's perks," John admitted with a smile at how flustered she was. It was a relief to see her so alive and vibrant after how he'd found her when he first came here, curled into a ball with a lifeless expression after one of her husband's rages. He noticed that with each passing moment they spent together he was able to bring out a little more of the girl he imagined she'd once been. "Like when I'm trying to impress a beautiful woman, for instance."

The cheeky grin she gave him then was something he'd begun to crave like air lately. Since their tryst on the balcony of her bed chamber she'd put some physical distance between them and made it clear they were not going to cross that line. He'd agreed that it was for the best, despite how badly he wanted to, for he knew it would only make her life harder. Still, he found himself doing anything to make her smile at him like that and bring a little joy to her days.

"What was it like? Living in the jungle?" She looked at him curiously from her reclined position against the tree trunk and for once he did not feel like a question about his past had an ulterior motive. Regina was asking because she wanted to know about him and his life, not about the legend.

"What do you want to know?" Something in her eyes made him want to be an open book for her. There was a goodness inside of her that radiated whenever she was treated with an ounce of kindness and his heart ached that she'd been deprived of it for so long.

"Who...took care of you? When you were a small child?" Regina's dark brow raised in the most endearing way and he could tell she was trying to word things as not to offend him.

"Her name was Kala," He smiled at the memory of his adoptive mother, glancing down towards the branch he straddled before back at Regina. She smiled faintly at him and the interest he saw in her dark brown eyes made him feel truly special. There were no traces of judgement or amusement at the mention of his adoptive family of apes. People usually only asked in order to snicker or relay tales of his legend, but she genuinely wanted to know. "She found me in the treehouse my father built and she raised me..kept me from harm. Kerchak was her mate and he did not approve of her taking me in. It caused some strife within the family."

She processed his statement before tilting her head inquisitively, "And she loved you? As a human mother would?"

"Very much so, even though I was the outcast," He nodded, "She always looked after me and protected me from those who did not accept me."

"Didn't you ever get lonely?" Her shoulders sagged a little and he could see she was reflecting upon her own life, seeing how they were different but similar in many ways.

"Of course. I knew I was different to those around me and I couldn't understand why. I had tried to keep up with them and be a part of their world, but for a long time no matter what I did it was not good enough. They were stronger and faster by design, I had to find other ways to gain their respect. Some of them would never accept me for what I was, though. Like Kerchak."

"Sounds like my mother," Regina scoffed quietly and rolled her eyes before gazing back at him, "She didn't think the life I wanted for myself was good enough...or that I was good enough. She always thought I should want more for myself. Love is weakness, she said."

"How could love ever be a weakness?" He asked genuinely, perking an eyebrow in confusion. The complexities of people in this realm were still a mystery to him at times, for he couldn't understand why they took such simple principles like love, that even animals understood, and turn them into something so complicated.

"She said when you love someone it makes you weak, that you'll settle for less," Her eyes averted from his gaze and he could tell she was thinking of her stable boy, "That you act foolishly and get yourself hurt."

"Maybe...but to love and be loved in return, for who you truly are, don't you think it'd be worth it?"

"I don't know, is it?" Regina smiled weakly in a rare display of vulnerability that made him want to pull her into his arms. But that would only lead to them getting carried away, and she did not want that, so he abstained.

"I wouldn't know..." He admitted with a shrug of his shoulders and saw the hesitation on her lips as she studied him.

"You've never been in love?"

"I've loved my family and the Porters, but I've never been _in love_...not the kind of love you read about..."

She bit her bottom lip and gazed down towards her hands that folded in her lap, "I loved Daniel and he loved me. It was...the best feeling I've ever experienced. Even if it was in secret and short lived," A sad smile graced her lips, "To know I'll never have it again is torture."

John watched her for a moment, feeling a pang of jealousy for her departed fiancé that was instantly followed by guilt. He shouldn't be coveting the love she had for a deceased man, but he couldn't help but imagine how glorious it must feel to be on the receiving end of her affection. "You never know..."

"I do know...I'm married to a man who does not love me," Regina looked up at him and the desperate heartbreak had returned to her dark brown eyes, "Who gets angry with me for not being his first wife. I am a Queen therefore even when Leopold passes I could never remarry, it isn't proper."

"Marriage is merely a contract under law, it is no gauge on the love people can have for one another," He looked at her hopefully, reaching out to cup her hands in his own. His were nearly twice the size of her petite ones, making him smile faintly as he gazed down at them.

"Even if I were to have an affair and fall in love with someone..." She replied and they both knew it was more than hypothetical, "I will never be able to experience things that normal couples do. Live together, have a family, be seen together..." Her voice was weak, making his heart sink, for he knew it was true. Because of the role she'd been forced into she would never lead a normal life. "Besides, who would find me suitable now?"

He lifted his head then, still holding her hands in his as he met her watery eyes with his gaze, "What do you mean?" His brow furrowed at the tremble of her lip and the tear that rolled down her cheek, shame lacing her expression.

She swallowed hard at the lump in her throat and stared down at their hands, "After what he's done to me...I feel...I feel disgusting, like people know that I've been used. Like that's what they see when they look at me."

John swallowed the knot that formed in his throat for her as he reached with one hand, gently tilting her chin up to make her look at him, "When I look at you, that is the furthest thing on my mind. What he's done does not determine your worth. You're so beautiful and funny and kind," He brushed a tear with his thumb, "That is when you're not being stubborn," He grinned when she let out a half laugh-half cry and sniffled, "..and even then I adore you."

Her eyes glistened with unshed tears as she caught her bottom lip between her teeth and gazed up at him with a devastatingly vulnerable expression on her face. His heart began to thump in his chest when he watched her gaze fall to his lips and her teeth release her own bottom one. He stilled entirely, watching her internal struggle play out on beautiful features as her eyes flickered towards his hands. If they were to cross the line between friends and lovers it would be here choice. He would put no pressure on her.

His breath caught in his throat when she tilted her head back up rather suddenly, her brown eyes turning a few shades darker as the apprehension in her expression faded into longing. She reached for him then, running her small hand over his scruffy jaw and carding delicate fingers through the hair behind his ear, leaning in to him while pulling him closer. He let her take control, let her study the features of his face, feeling her focus linger on his lips and his chin.

"Hm," He hummed as she caressed the sharp planes of his jawline, tilting his head down to lean his forehead against hers. She gave a choppy little breath and dipped her chin towards his, lingering only inches from his lips, undoubtedly trying to talk herself out of it. A piece of his willpower wavered, responding by pulling her gently by the hand that was still entwined in his, picking her up with his other hand on her hip and lifting her towards him. It wasn't his intention, but she came so willingly that she ended up straddling his legs, knees bent by his sides as his hands slid down to hold her by her hips.

Both of her hands cupped his face now and she gave a faint, heated smile before she pressed her mouth to his with determination. He kissed her back instantly, bringing one hand up to the back of her hair to keep her mouth against his, shivering when she gave a contented sigh against his lips. Her tongue peeped out from between her own and he opened his mouth for her, groaning when their tongues brushed slowly. He could tell she had not been held, had not been pleasured by the contact of another human being for years with the way she pressed her hips down against his and arched her body into him.

His blood ran hot at the way she responded to his touch with a slightly hungrier kiss, their tongues dueling playfully. He felt her lips curl and a playful hum escape her throat when he withdrew his tongue and tugged her lip with his teeth. It was when she attacked his lips with more ferocity in response that he began to stir in his pants, groaning into her mouth and slipping his hands lower until they cupped her bottom. She moaned in response and he began to throb and stiffen, feeling her begin to grind her hips against his.

"As much.." He spoke in broken words as he kissed her languidly, "..as I would love for this..." He kissed her again, hearing her moan again, "..to continue, we must remember where...we are."

She pulled back then, lips swollen and flushed, letting out a giggle when she peered over the side of the tree limb and back up at him with wide eyes. Tarzan was a legend. One that fought the biggest beasts and swung from the highest treetops. He had the speed and agility of a wild animal, ensuring he never lost a battle or missed a tree limb. John Clayton, however, was falling hard.

* * *

 _Present day..._

Regina huffed as she sat perched on the log, worry gnawing at her insides over where Henry was and if Emma and the group had found him yet. She and John couldn't be very far behind them, that is if they'd found clues that would lead them to Pan's lair. She'd hoped the biological mother of her son had found a way towards their son, for she was their only hope. _The idiot Charmings would certainly not figure it out._

It was nearly pitch black in the jungle now, the taller trees and foliage blocking out the stars and moon of the night sky. She shivered a little as the temperature began to drop, wishing she hadn't shucked her blazer and silk shirt in a fit of rage a few miles back. The nocturnal animals began to make noises, most of which she couldn't place, giving her an eerie feeling as she waited for John's return.

He'd went to scavenge for dry enough wood to start a small fire and something for them to eat, stating he wouldn't go far. They'd managed not to argue for the last couple of hours though the tension had remained. There were so many words unspoken between them and things they didn't have time to delve into. She knew he was angry with her, he had every right to be after how she'd wrecked his life.

She'd never considered what she would do or say to him if she saw him again, for she never thought she would after he left the Enchanted Forest years ago. To be near him now unnerved her and kept her on edge, the feelings she had held for him confusing and frightening her as they flooded back. The combination of being worried for her son and accosted by someone from her past was overwhelming her, though she was desperately trying not to show it.

It was like there was never a safe place for her to go anymore. Not that there ever really was. But at least in Storybrooke, before the curse was broken, she had her son and her home she could retreat to whenever her past haunted her. Now her son barely acknowledged her, even hated her at times, and the people she was in this realm with all despised her for one reason or another. She supposed she brought it on herself, so she couldn't complain, but it kept her on edge constantly. Not being in control of her emotions was only going to fluster her and slow down the process of her finding her son and she could not have that. So she steeled her demeanor the best she could, making a pact with herself that she would remain focused on her son and nothing else.

A rustling in the leaves nearby brought her from her daydream and she let out a breath of relief at the fact he'd returned, deciding to be cantankerous and take her mood out on him just to keep a healthy distance between them, "I hope you found something other than bugs to eat-"

Her heart caught in her throat when a dark figure shown itself, stepping out of the foliage where she expected John to be. Two glistening black eyes stared her down, causing her to stand immediately in preparation to run. She'd been trying to save her magic for getting Henry back but she clenched her fists, knowing she may have to resort to it to get herself out of this. She prayed that it had adjusted to this realm and she could conjure it as quickly as she normally did.

The ape looked to be twice as tall as she was as it stalked towards her slowly, snorting threateningly while it stared her down. She stumbled over roots and branches as she walked backwards, seeing the blood lust in it's eyes. This was clearly it's territory and she was intruding, the knowledge causing her heart to nearly lurch from her chest. _She knew what she used to do to intruders in her forest._

With a deep roar the beast suddenly charged at her, clearing the distance between them in just a few lunges. It brought it's hand from the ground as it approached her, thrusting it in an upward motion that caught her in the midsection and threw her backwards. She landed with a thud, wheezing for air as she laid on her back, mind racing and pain shooting through her body. The ground vibrated as it trudged for her and she brought up her hands in defense, magic sparking and stalling from a combination of her nerves and her power not being acclimated to the realm.

The ape leered over her and let out a roar, preparing to slam it's clenched fists down at her when a sudden call from behind caught its attention. Relief flooded her when she realized John had returned, quickly followed with fear for his safety as the beast turned and set it's sights on him. She scrambled to sit up, seeing the ape and John square off towards each other.

"Whatever you do, do not interfere," John glanced at her warningly as he circled with the beast in a ritual she could tell meant battle. He turned back to the ape and spread his impressive arms to the side, letting out a call that signaled to the animal that the fight was on.

Her eyes grew wide and she gasped as they charged one another, leaping from the forest ground and slamming their bodies together with a force she feared his frame could not withstand. She could hear him groan as they fell to the ground and rolled, dread filling her as she considered what could happen. He'd grown up here, with them, and probably knew how to keep himself alive during a fight with a beast twice his size. Still she felt as if she couldn't breathe as she watched, still trying to draw in a deep breath after having it knocked from her earlier.

"John!" She cried out with worry when the ape slung him to the ground and he landed in a heap. Her fear for his life nearly made her unaware that the primate had turned it's sights back on her and began a slow, deathly stalk in her direction, undoubtedly believing he had one and that she would be easy an easy kill.

John had told her a little about the customs of the ape family and how they expressed dominance over territory and the rituals of claiming what was theirs. This one was either angry that his home had been invaded or was trying to claim her, but her fireballs sputtered in her hands from her position in the dirt as her brain scrambled for an alternative.

The beast pounded the ground during its last few steps towards her, large body mass swinging into the air in preparation to pummel her before she saw John leap in between them. His body took the blow as he landed on top of her on all fours, pounding the ground around her in an obvious display of possession. The ape landed two heavy blows to his back and she saw him grimace as he kept his head to the side and stared back at him, keeping a strong position over her body as she lay on her back.

The animal pounded the ground in obvious frustration as it accepted John's claim on her before turning and retreating back into the foliage, leaving her to look up at the man who had just saved her life. His strong arms shook, telling her he was in obvious pain as he turned his gaze to meet hers. There was an immense worry in his eyes that faded a little when his eyes swept her face and glanced in between their bodies, realizing she wasn't harmed.

"John, are you all right?" She scrambled to sit up when he collapsed to the side of her and rolled onto his back with a heavy groan. "I'm sorry I- I tried to help but my magic. I couldn't procure enough to hurt him let alone kill him."

John opened his eyes slightly as he looked up at her, chest heaving with exhaustion, "It's okay. I couldn't let you kill him, anyways."

"Why not?" She sputtered, eyes widening as they fixated on the bite mark on his right shoulder just below his neck.

"He's my brother."

"Your brother?" She shook her head, trying to catch her breath and slow her racing heart as she processed it all, "If he's your brother then why was he trying to kill me?!"

"Because..." John looked at her, a hint of coldness in his light eyes, "...he knows what you did to me."

* * *

 _Enchanted Forest..._

Regina suppressed a grin, pretending to be engrossed in her book as her eyes scanned the pages, retaining nothing. She felt his eyes on her, felt the tension in his body as he set next to her at the table in the library of the castle. It was the one meeting place that was safe enough for them if they were caught together, for they could merely pretend they had only happened to frequent the common room at the same time.

She felt like a giddy teenager again with the way he watched her every movement, making her want to tease him and flirt and be playful for the first time in years. It felt good to be noticed and appreciated, to be able to take pride in being a woman and actually like what she could do to the man beside her. His elbows leaned on the table and his square chin rested on one of his propped up hands, blatantly staring at her with a smug grin on his face that made her stomach coil. Just being near him flustered her in a way no one had, for his presence was like nothing she'd experienced.

They both were well aware that she wasn't actually getting any reading done, but they'd heard voices traveling down the hall outside of the library just moments ago and had been forced to cease their conversation. They were sitting at one of the tables on the east wing of the room, hidden somewhat behind a couple of the taller shelves that stretched across the middle. It wasn't by accident, either. They'd picked this spot because it was the most secluded. It was becoming more and more natural to steal away in the library or around a corner or in the forest to talk and steal kisses. _And it was wonderful._

For the first time in years she finally felt like she had a confidant. Her entire stay here had been a lonely, miserable existence until John Clayton showed up. A visit that Regina had once rolled her eyes about and wrote off as another one of Leopold's excuses to have an endless party had turned out to be one of the most exciting things to happen to her yet. This man, a handsome, gentle, kind man, was enamored with her. When she talked, he actually listened and responded. He wanted to know more about her. He found her interesting. He searched for her in a crowded room and smiled at her when their gazes locked.

She felt like she was slowly being brought back to life after years of feeling nothing. She'd lived with nothing but her bitterness and resent that was slowly beginning to eat her alive. Before this she'd been lured closer and closer towards the darkness by Rumplestiltskin, having no reason to hold onto the girl she'd once been. But now she felt someone pulling her back towards the light, giving her a reason to look forward to waking up in the morning again.

"I think we're safe now," He murmured, reaching out to run a hand into her hair and turn her head to him. She flashed a grin as she responded instantly, leaning in to press her lips against his, relishing in the feeling of his stubbled chin brushing against her own. Each stolen kiss between them gave her a rush, waking something inside of her that had been dormant for so long.

"Mmm," She moaned against his lips when his hand resumed it's exploration of her torso, "Has..Leopold...asked you...to extend...your stay again...yet?" She whispered in between kisses, feeling his thumb brush against the side of her breast.

"Mhm," John grinned against her lips before kissing her deeply, sliding his tongue along her own in a way that made her nipples harden, "He mentioned...a ball...coming up..."

"I'm sure he'll want you to...take Sn-Snow," She broke the kiss, pressing her forehead to his as her eyes closed when he cupped her breast. Her body was on fire with the amount of kissing and fondling they'd done this morning and his thumb flicking over her nipple didn't help.

"I don't want Snow," He groaned when she inched her palm up his thigh, moving his lips to her neck and causing her head to roll back against the chair.

"Are you sure?" She whispered just to taunt him, biting down on her lip when he thumbed her nipple faster and sucked down on her skin gently.

"I want you so badly Your Majesty," He nipped her skin, causing her to purr as he jerked her chair closer to his, reaching down with his other hand to ruck up her dress. Her heart began to pound in her ears, her own hands coming up to thread through his hair. "I can't even concentrate on what she says to me at the dinner table because all I'm thinking about is you."

The vindictive part of her reveled in his words and she smirked, lips parting when he slipped a hand under her dress and pushed her knees apart. She felt his lips curl against her neck as he continued his path of warm, wet kisses, inching his fingers up the inside of her thigh. Her breath quickened when he reached the apex of her thighs and ran his fingers over her sex through her small clothes.

"Oh," She gasped when he began to rub circles where she throbbed, the friction of the clothing between his fingers and her flesh intensifying the feeling. Her right hand gripped the arm of her chair, the other gripping his thigh higher and higher. Her mind swirled as he did delicious things to her neck, sucking down gently enough not to mark her but firmly enough to bring pleasure.

She and Daniel had fooled around, kissing and heavy petting the extent of what they were able to do in their brief moments alone. This felt more heated somehow, John's fingers more skilled and his rhythm more confident as he massaged her sex, making her stomach coil and her breath quicken. "Do you want me to stop, Regina?" He murmured against her neck as he peppered it with teasing kisses.

Her heart beat wildly in her chest, eyes closed and back arching from the back of the chair she sat in, knees spreading wider instinctually, "N-no," She replied before feeling his fingers draw on the string of her small clothes, slipping his hand inside of them. Regina gasped loudly at the feeling of his fingers touching her so intimately, feeling her neck and face flush.

John lifted his head then, face hovering over hers with eyes a little darker than they usually were when she opened her own, "You're magnificent," He watched her and she could only stare back at him in response, chest panting and hips beginning to jerk when he massaged her most sensitive part faster. She was slick down there, how she'd used to find herself after dreams of Daniel, but she hadn't known why. Any conscious sexual desire had quickly been thwarted when the King stole her innocence and she'd associated sex with discomfort. _Until now._

Her abdomen seemed to tighten and tingle as the feeling grew, finding herself wanting to push her hips up to his hand in search of more friction. She wasn't even sure of what she chased but his lips lingered over hers and he groaned at her body's response to him, her eyes closing and lips parting with a moan. " _Mmmm! Oh god...John_ ," She gasped as the tension built and her nails dug into his thigh, rolling her hips up as his fingers toyed with her faster, firmer.

"So lovely," He coaxed her in a voice so deep it gave her chills, feeling him nip and kiss over her jaw line slowly.

Regina whimpered at the sensations before her body violently tensed, causing her to cry out sharply as an overwhelming heat wracked her body. It was sweet and intense and made her back arch from the chair she sat in, taking her by surprise. His fingers moved much slower as she came down from the high, seemingly drawing the feeling out, leaving her panting for breath and opening her eyes to look at him in surprise.

"What in the hell did you just do to me?" Her brows furrowed up at him, mind cloudy with pleasure as tremors still shot down her thighs and she felt her heartbeat between her legs. He merely smiled back at her, both of their attentions drawn suddenly to the sound of someone turning the library door handle.

John quickly removed his hand from under her dress, tugging it back down and picking up his chair to put some distance between them at the table. She glanced down at her trembling hands with wide eyes, body still buzzing and mind racing from what he'd done to her. Despite her shaking, she grabbed the book on the table to look as if she were reading when they heard the door creak open. When she stole a last glance at him, John simply lifted his fingertips that had pleasured her to his mouth, slipping them in it briefly before letting out a low sound as he withdrew them and picked up the book.

Her mouth gaped at the lewd gesture, mind instantly considering what it would feel like for him to actually taste her. He must've seen her reaction to him from the corner of his eye, for he merely smirked and continued to pretend to read. She scrambled to look back at her own reading material when the footsteps neared through the library, hearing whoever it was coming closer.

"John! There you are!" Snow beamed girlishly at him, sending an instant pang of irritation and hatred through Regina. The girl had the ability to ruin every single good moment in her life.

"Mother," Snow nodded politely at her, causing Regina to remember herself and force a tight smile up at the girl. She loathed her to call her mother. She was only six years older than her, after all. It was foolish and made her feel much older than she was.

"Father wishes to invite you to my competition today," She smiled proudly, tilting her chin up, "I'll be racing my horse in the champion ship. I've already won three ribbons for it. It really is quite an event, will you join us?"

Regina felt John glance her way but she kept her gaze toward her book, blood boiling despite her aloof demeanor. Wasn't it typical that the girl who cost her her own freedom now enjoyed, _even bragged about_ , doing something she used to love to do. Something she found joy in before she was forced to be Queen and forbidden by Leopold to ride past the perimeter of the castle. Now Snow White won awards for it and used horseback riding to take away the one positive aspect in her life now. John.

"I..." John hesitated and Snow clasped her hands in front of her in a pleading manner.

"Please, please, _please,_ if you don't go I know I won't win!" She said dramatically and Regina had to suppress an eye roll, "And father wants you to join him."

"It sounds lovely," John replied politely, and although Regina knew he didn't mean it she still felt a pang of jealousy and irritation at him. "Your Majesty, will you be joining us?"

Her faith in him was restored and she had to stifle a smile when she looked up from her book, pretending to be unaware of the question. Before she could fake her confusion and ask what they were talking about, Snow butted in as usual.

"Oh, Regina hates these things," Snow giggled, "She's not big on leaving the castle and she only rides in carriages. She never goes. Isn't that right, Mother?"

Regina's eyes shifted towards the idiot in front of her, rage building inside her as she stared holes through the girl. Snow paid her no mind, however, eyes fixated on John in anticipation of his answer. When she looked back at his hesitation she knew she had to say something before they gave themselves away, "Oh no, it really isn't my cup of tea. Though I'm sure you would definitely enjoy it, Lord Greystoke. I hope the two of you have a delightful afternoon," She replied in a forced pleasant tone.

He bit his bottom lip, traces of reluctance in his expression before he seemingly understood her attempt to keep suspicion away from them, "Shall we, Princess?" He turned to her then, holding out his arm in a gentlemanly gesture. They left the library, John glancing back at Regina apologetically as Snow chattered away and they eventually disappeared around the corner of the bookcase. _And once again, Regina was alone._

* * *

 _Present..._

"We're not going anywhere until we get this stitched up..." Gentle fingers pressed against his wound, making him forget a bit of the pain, "Are you eating them?" He heard Regina squawk from behind him as she sat on a stump, using the ant shells to stitch up the gash on his neck after he'd taught her how. He smirked to himself, still tired and woozy from the fight but feeling better, especially with her hands on him.

"Taste like bacon," He offered up, goading her, "Want a bite?" He turned his head back to her and smirked, watching her huff and tilt her head to the side in frustration of him moving.

"No! I'm not an animal," She grit and used her hand to push his head back around, "This is disgusting enough. If my magic was working I'd just heal you myself."

He sighed, letting her finish pushing the shells into his skin before he stood. His shoulder had been dislocated after the fight and she'd helped him push it back into place, despite the fact she'd gone as pale as a ghost while doing so. The hardness in his heart towards her lessened at the sheer worry that had been written in her expression at the state of him. Of course, it wasn't that she cared. She probably just didn't want to be left alone without his help.

"How is it?" She asked as he gingerly worked his arm in a circular motion, grimacing at the soreness.

"Manageable," He replied quietly with his back to her, stepping around the fire they'd build for light from the spark of her magic palms. She didn't say anything else and neither did he. He wasn't a complainer by nature and he'd be damned if he'd seek pity from her, for she'd dealt with worse. _Hell,_ he'd seen her handle injuries without making a peep. She'd even go as far as to put on a pretty face and smile through the pain back in the Enchanted Forest.

"Pain..."

He bit his lip at the sound of her tired voice, keeping his back to her. She always tended to open up more when she felt the spotlight wasn't on her, so he kept his face towards the jungle and looked out into the night. Typical of her, it took exhaustion and almost losing their lives for her to show an ounce of vulnerability. But he waited patiently with an open mind, anticipating what she was about to say.

"I have too much experience with it," She muttered, her voice low with a hint of bitterness in it. "My past...back in the Enchanted Forest..." He noted the hint of a pleading tone in her voice, as if she were asking him to understand. Was she trying to explain herself for what she'd done?" "...That place, the people...it changed me. I became what they made me...a monster."

His blood ran cold at her declaration. He'd heard tales of what happened in the Enchanted Forest once Leopold died and Regina took reign. From the stories it sounded like it was a massacre. She'd killed anyone who showed loyalty to her step-daughter and explained herself to none. But here she was, asking him to understand after what she'd done to him.

"What you've heard is probably true," Her voice was gritty now, inflected with a hint of emotion that caused him to turn sideways and peer back at her. She met his gaze with intense eyes that flickered in the firelight. His heart skipped a beat at the way her past seemed to haunt her expression and he caught a glimpse of the Evil Queen that everyone spoke of. "I did terrible things...out of pain...Things I cannot take back. I hurt people that I care about just to get back at someone that I blamed for my misery...and I can't undo what I've done."

He watched her eyes glisten with unshed tears in the dim light, saw her throat struggle to work when she paused and remained silent, casting her gaze towards the ground in shame. A part of him wanted to comfort her but he held back. He had tried that once. He'd gotten close to her, had fallen for her, only to be used and discarded like he meant nothing to her. Still the pain he saw in her expression and glimpse of an explanation haunted him, for he knew there was so much more behind it all.

John turned back towards the slight clearing he'd been facing, hearing the faint sound of an elephant call. Soft but heavy footsteps vibrated the ground beneath his feet, prompting him to step out into the moonlight and greet the approaching elephant herd. He considered what Regina just admitted, processing the grief and regret she'd expressed in such brief detail. She'd been in a great deal of pain when he met her and he could tell she was still struggling today. Oddly enough, he didn't feel as vindicated by it as he thought he would.

He heard her footsteps behind him as he approached the herd, seeing one of his oldest friends leading the pack. The moonlight pouring in the small clearing of trees above them gave enough light to see the wise eyes of the magnificent creatures, prompting him to lift his hand and place it on the face of the elephant, "My old friend..." He murmured reminiscently.

John felt Regina come up beside him, watching her out of the corner of his eye as she inched towards another elephant. She almost hesitated, head tilted in awe of the creature and he knew she wasn't scared of it. She was holding back because of what _she_ felt _she_ was.

He spoke up then, gaze shifting back to the one in front of him to give her a private moment, "The tribe of this land say that an elephant's eyes speak the greatest language...for who else can make you feel so much without a word?"

When he glanced back towards her he saw her staring up at the elephant before her with glistening eyes as she swallowed hard. A baby elephant made a noise then and Regina looked down quickly when it appeared from behind its mother's legs. His heart ached at the gentle smile she gave it when it approached her without hesitation and she reached out to press her hand against it's face. The surprise written on her beautiful features when it lifted it's trunk towards her without a hint of fear told John she really did believe herself to be a monster.

He felt instant gratitude towards the herd and their understanding nature, looking back to the elephant that stood before him in thanks that they crossed paths. Despite what Regina had done to him or anyone else, he knew her before she turned dark. He knew that there was still a trace of that woman deep down inside of her. For his own sake he could not be the one to bring her back, but he hoped for Regina's sake that one day someone could.


End file.
